We got a tip off to search someones room and found one white shirt with the words POLICE written on it. A handmade credintials badge made from colored pencils and some soap that was carved in to the shape of a handgun. Due to some vigiliance of the other prisoners a lot of drama could have been shut down.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Charge: Undercover Police
Sadly some well thought out minds come to jail or possibly just they have seen too many movies.
Chage: Adrenline: Fight, Flight, or get knocked out.
A couple detectives arrived to serve a search warrant for DNA, they were expecting a fight but didn't know the signs, I did and I was the closest one by. Instinct and training came in to play when he stood up quickly and pulled his pants up and before his fists made it past his stomach, he was out cold.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Charge: Crimeline
Inmates in special housing area, watched 24/7 by Officers get privledes, however restricted moreso than the normal Inmate. One Inmate decided when his door opened to clean the trash out, he was free and he was going to run as far as he could. The distance he was able to run was 3 feet, before he met a clothesline by a bystanding Officer.
Several hours later, he was permitted out to use the telephone, and he immediately called Crimeline to report a crime, apparently he thought we were deaf and began to lower his voice and whisper to them that he was being beaten by the police here, and they were making plans to kill him tonight. He requested Crimeline send the Police here to save him and arrest the Officer for preventing his escape.
Several hours later, he was permitted out to use the telephone, and he immediately called Crimeline to report a crime, apparently he thought we were deaf and began to lower his voice and whisper to them that he was being beaten by the police here, and they were making plans to kill him tonight. He requested Crimeline send the Police here to save him and arrest the Officer for preventing his escape.
Charge: War Paint
Certain medications will toast a persons mind. One inmate, was previously housed at a "mental health hospital" in California, apparently he had volunteered for a test medication. He was an excellent high school football player, and not any problem with his mental health, however he was riding the "insanity defense" to the rails.
After he took that medication, for years, he became GONE, officially GONE.
When he arrived back at our facility, his right hand had a problem. It was permanetly attached to his penis, and his feet-they could only be cleaned in a toilet.
He spent days masturbating only to pass out mid stroke, reawake and continue wearing it raw. He would let loose his fluids on the window and then recycle it back via his tongue.
He also decided his toilet was only for feet washing, urination and defication only occured on the feed shoot and walls. After several months, he was eventually released back to the streets, where he was not deemed a threat to society.
We had a severe over crowding problem, and the second he was removed from the cell for releasing, it was moderately "cleaned" and a new inmate placed in it. This one also decided he was "crazy" and decided to bang and scream, but oh no-that wasn't enough for him, he was a warrior.
He proceeded to use his finger, to rub "dirt" from the cracks in the floor and wall and draw war paint on his face. This encouraged him to scream louder, until the Officer inside informed him he should likely smell that "war paint" finger.
He was immediately uncrazy and began to cry over the feces he had smeared all over his face.
After he took that medication, for years, he became GONE, officially GONE.
When he arrived back at our facility, his right hand had a problem. It was permanetly attached to his penis, and his feet-they could only be cleaned in a toilet.
He spent days masturbating only to pass out mid stroke, reawake and continue wearing it raw. He would let loose his fluids on the window and then recycle it back via his tongue.
He also decided his toilet was only for feet washing, urination and defication only occured on the feed shoot and walls. After several months, he was eventually released back to the streets, where he was not deemed a threat to society.
We had a severe over crowding problem, and the second he was removed from the cell for releasing, it was moderately "cleaned" and a new inmate placed in it. This one also decided he was "crazy" and decided to bang and scream, but oh no-that wasn't enough for him, he was a warrior.
He proceeded to use his finger, to rub "dirt" from the cracks in the floor and wall and draw war paint on his face. This encouraged him to scream louder, until the Officer inside informed him he should likely smell that "war paint" finger.
He was immediately uncrazy and began to cry over the feces he had smeared all over his face.
Charge: Sticking it to the man
While doing a routine check of the lock down housing area. You could smell it when you walked in, and likely so could the neighbors. The problem is, you can hear us coming doors make loud booms when the electronic locks disengage. We were right there. The inmates did the only thing they could think of, pretend they were sleeping.
Right on top of each other, as we enter their room and yell their name, they pretend to wake up, and the bottom boy starts screaming at the guy for "falling asleep on top of him again."
Sadly, you can see some of these peoples, "friends" or "babies mommas". We checked on one of them, this guy on the bottom, his girlfriend a white 19 year old skinny, somewhat good looking, probably a 7. But now she's also getting screwed by this guy, who is also taking it. As for the guy that was on top, I'm pretty sure he only comes to Jail to get a new boyfriend. Becaues he always signs himself in to protective custody, to get some "alone time".
Right on top of each other, as we enter their room and yell their name, they pretend to wake up, and the bottom boy starts screaming at the guy for "falling asleep on top of him again."
Sadly, you can see some of these peoples, "friends" or "babies mommas". We checked on one of them, this guy on the bottom, his girlfriend a white 19 year old skinny, somewhat good looking, probably a 7. But now she's also getting screwed by this guy, who is also taking it. As for the guy that was on top, I'm pretty sure he only comes to Jail to get a new boyfriend. Becaues he always signs himself in to protective custody, to get some "alone time".
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Charge: Juvenile Delininquency...Retardation.
We have a severe Juvenile crime problem in our area. Violent-murder, rape, robbery problem.
They always get probation if they didn't manage to kill the person because they suck at aiming.
We received a call that we had a juvenile coming in, because he violated his probation, dirty piss? Didn't make it that far. Juvenile probation is scheduled for the same day, every week. The kid goes in to his probation officer to do the usual meeting, and drug test. However when he arrives and goes to sit down, his handgun falls out and to the floor. A convicted felon juvenile offender, who brought his handgun to his probation officers office. The gene pool flourishes.
They always get probation if they didn't manage to kill the person because they suck at aiming.
We received a call that we had a juvenile coming in, because he violated his probation, dirty piss? Didn't make it that far. Juvenile probation is scheduled for the same day, every week. The kid goes in to his probation officer to do the usual meeting, and drug test. However when he arrives and goes to sit down, his handgun falls out and to the floor. A convicted felon juvenile offender, who brought his handgun to his probation officers office. The gene pool flourishes.
Charge: Victim of a theft
Woman recently was arrested for drug possession. Nothing new.
However she was arrested because she called the police to report a crime, warrant? Nope.
She called the police to report someone had stolen her property, what you ask? A bag of cocaine.
The cop arrives and asks her if he can make sure the cocaine is really missing, and if he can search her purse. Confidant that her drugs have been stolen, she agrees.
And, there it was, now you're going to jail.
However she was arrested because she called the police to report a crime, warrant? Nope.
She called the police to report someone had stolen her property, what you ask? A bag of cocaine.
The cop arrives and asks her if he can make sure the cocaine is really missing, and if he can search her purse. Confidant that her drugs have been stolen, she agrees.
And, there it was, now you're going to jail.
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